Archive for April, 2010
MY DAILY MONOLOGUE JOKES
Apr 7th
Last week President Bush’s former chief advisor Karl Rove was heckled at a book signing. Rove considered punishing the men before realizing there is no worse punishment than attending a Karl Rove book signing.
Obama is going over last minute preparations for his State of the Union speech tonight. Suit? Check. Tie? Check. Muzzle for Joe Biden? Check
President Obama’s threw out the first pitch at the Nationals home opener this weekend. The pitch was high and outside, Obama calls this pitch the Matthew McConaughey.
MY DAILY MONOLOGUE JOKES
Apr 6th
Jesse James has slept with a few girls with tattoos. If he wanted to read in bed he could have bought an iPad.
Tiger Woods held a press conference to say that the reception he got from fans blew him away. Wait, isn’t that what got him in trouble in the first place?!
MY DAILY MONOLOGUE JOKE
Apr 5th
An 8 year old boy from Ohio took his parents minivan for a ride and crashed it 100 yards from his house. The boy defended himself saying that Gatorade told him to Be Like Tiger.
WAIT A MINUTE! WAIT A MINUTE!
Apr 5th
“He was murdered then set on fire while celebrating his birthday.”
THANKS TO ALL AT E!
Apr 5th
I hosted The Daily 10 on E! all of last week and two days of the previous week. I had the pleasure of hosting the show with Catt Sadler and getting to know the whole E! team. I would say the highlight was being in the same room as Wendy Williams. (or peeing in Seacrest’s bathroom…it’s pretty damn close.) Here’s a pic of me in action… 
And here’s a pic of me and @grasiemercedes at a taping of The Soup with the super funny Joel McHale…
