ATOMIC ZOO!!!
Apr 16th
Here’s a comedy short a couple friends of mine did a while back. Dave Holmes and Derek Miller* are hilarious and so exacting in their impersonations of Morning Zoo DJs. It’s fun. It’s funny. You should watch…
*If you’d like to see the best improv show in LA that I’ve ever seen, go see Improvise: The Musical. Friday nights at iOWest in Hollywood. Pound for pound the funniest show out there.
MY LATEST MONOLOGUE JOKES
Apr 15th
A new study says that spanking your 3 year old can turn him into a 5 year old bully. I’m not that scared because it’s pretty easy to kick a 5 year old’s ass.
On Thursday, a Pennsylvania man was arrested after leaving marijuana in his son’s Elmo backpack. Police became suspicious when Elmo started shouting, “Me Elmo, Me Want Funyuns.”
MY HOMAGE TO LETTERMAN
Apr 14th
It’s no secret that I worship David Letterman’s comedic ability and showmanship. I recently got involed in a comedy writing group and had to write up a desk piece segment of my choosing; I chose Letterman’s Top 10 List. Here is my stab at it… I wanted to share with all of you….
Top 10 Alternate Uses for Your iPad
10. Your dog will love it as a shiny frisbee
9. To signal fellow prisoner in adjoining cell
8. Really expensive fajita serving tray
7. Porn
6. Buy two iPads, a jar of mayonaise, some lunch meat and make a sandwich from the future!
5. I’ll tell you about alternate uses once I figure out what it’s primary use is.
4. Porn
3. Flava Flav hangs it around his neck to use as a digital clock
2. Complete your time machine, travel back to 1918 with it and blow some minds!
1. Porn
IT’S POSITIVE DAY ON TWITTER
Apr 14th
Dave Holmes and a few friends have started Positive Day on Twitter today. If you are a fan of my Twitter feed, thank you. But, I must admit, it’s not always the most positive, inspiring thing to read as it is mostly jokes and comedic takes on pop culture. (Do you know how hard it is to restrain myself from writing a KFC Double Down joke today!?) Now the way I see it, there’s nothing wrong with being snarky and having opinions, I just thought it would be nice to take a day to put into perspective how awe inspiring it is to be alive. Also, to have been given the gift of having so many brilliant, talented, smart and caring friends who challenge and inspire me every day and drive me to be a better person. If you aren’t into the positive day thing, that’s cool, no one is forcing you to take part in it. But, I thought it was necessary for me to explain why I’m taking part. So, if you are in the middle of enjoying your positive day, here are a couple of videos that I saw a while ago that always help redeem my outlook on life. Enjoy!
and another…
