The Fahey Chronicles
Adults need an app that alerts us when we are being secretly photographed in public by mean teenagers.
No one's ever driven a Corolla faster than 45 mph.
“Mr. Fahey is next” “Mr. Comey, my colleague is wheeling in a hoop. Can you dunk this basketball for us?” *dunks* “Sick. That’s all I have."
Scary thought: Someone somewhere has video of you dancing at a concert.
My Untuckit shirt lets women at the bar know I’m going to become an issue around midnight.
Whenever I see someone asleep on a plane I think, "Wow. That's how they're going to look when they're dead."
I’d like to extend my deepest sympathies to the mortician who’ll have to deal with Roger Ailes big fat nude body.
Uh-oh. Your tenth smartest friend is posting inspirational quotes again.
If you hear, “He never had a bad word to say about anybody”, you're at a boring guy's funeral.
If FOX is looking for an O'Reilly replacement, I'd just like to say I've hosted TV before and am too shy to even look most women in the eye.
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Damien Fahey © 2017. All Rights Reserved.
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